6 Skills of Great Negotiators
- NextArrow
- Oct 19, 2022
- 3 min read
Updated: May 21

People would rather skydive, shave their heads, or eat bugs than step into a negotiation. Yes, bugs.
However, we all negotiate every day, be it deciding on deadlines with teammates, setting project goals with managers, or discussing terms with clients. These conversations don’t have to feel like a high-stakes showdown. When you build the right habits and approach negotiations with skill, you can improve your negotiation game from tough talks to productive ones.
Let’s break down six skills of great negotiators and how to strengthen them before your next big conversation.
Why the Skills of Great Negotiators Matter
Negotiation is more than a back-and-forth exchange. It’s a process that affects relationships, outcomes, and trust. Strong negotiators influence deals, shape workplace culture, and create clarity where there's conflict.
The good news is that these skills aren’t reserved for natural-born dealmakers. You can develop them with a mix of intention and practice.
Take Aim
Effective negotiators begin with a clear sense of purpose. Before stepping into a conversation, you need to know what matters most. Research points to four categories people tend to value in negotiations:
Instrumental goals: The outcome or result
Relationship goals: How you want the other person to feel about you
Process goals: How fairly you want the conversation to go
Self goals: How the process aligns with your values
Try this: Outline your goals in each category before the meeting. It brings structure to your approach and sharpens your focus.
Shift Perspective
Knowing what you want is only half the equation. You also need to consider what the other person values.
Great negotiators take time to think about the other person’s priorities. Research shows that doing this before the conversation increases the chances of finding mutual wins.
Try this: Ask yourself:
What would make them say “yes” to my offer?
What might lead them to say “no”?
The clearer you get on their motivations, the more options you’ll see.
Develop Curiosity
Top negotiators ask more questions—twice as many as average negotiators.
Why is that? Because curiosity builds connection. It also reveals insights that strengthen your position and create space for collaboration.
Try this: Use the MIQ (Most Important Question) technique:
Spend two minutes writing down all your questions
Spend two more minutes refining them
Spend one minute ranking them by how genuinely curious they are
This small shift improves your mindset and changes the tone of the negotiation.
Keep Your Head
Negotiations bring out nerves, and that’s normal. What separates strong negotiators from the rest is emotional control.
Feeling nervous doesn’t have to hurt your performance. In fact, it can help when you redirect that energy into excitement.
Try this: Write down one or two things you’re excited about in the upcoming conversation. When the nerves kick in, return to those thoughts.
Get Creative
Rigid thinking leads to rigid outcomes. Strong negotiators treat negotiation like a puzzle with multiple solutions. They brainstorm ideas and stay flexible.
Try this: Move your eyes side to side for 30 seconds. It may sound odd. However, research shows it boosts cross-brain communication and creative thinking.
Find Common ground
Winning doesn’t mean “defeating” the other side. Great negotiators look for areas of agreement early on. This creates a shared foundation and makes the other person more open to hearing your point of view.
Try this: Don’t stack your argument with five or six points. Just bring your two strongest ones. Research shows that simplicity often persuades more than complexity.
Build Negotiation Strength That Lasts
NextArrow assists teams and leaders in sharpening the skills of great negotiators through interactive workshops, group coaching, and one-on-one support.
Our programs combine research-backed tools with a learning experience to help you build confidence, stay calm under pressure, and approach every conversation with clarity.
We design our workshops for up to 30 participants and adjust them to your team’s goals. Let’s build better negotiators—together. Contact us today.
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